In this interview with Sandie Martel of Be OK Therapy, the UK’s Alternative Divorce Guide Suzy Miller interviews her about the first of 3 key pieces of advice, taken from Sandie’s personal story to help you deal with your divorce in the best possible manner.
Divorce can be a very messy and devastating experience – so when dealing with divorce ……
Take Your Time!
The first thing you wish for when starting the process is a quick divorce, in the hope that it will help you start afresh sooner, so that you can finally leave the past where it belongs.
We all want that.
However, my advice to you is to take your time.
Why?
Simply because our state of mind constantly changes as time goes by and the divorce carries on. You are going to have to deal with lawyers, the stress your children are going through, pressure from your job, your ex maybe and your new life.
To start with, you really wish to be done with this extremely stressful and painful process. You are even ready to leave the financial side behind and do exactly as your ex wishes.
I know you want to keep a good relationship with your ex. But you can still do so while actually taking the time to consider all your options and think about the future, your future. Even more so if you have children.
I personally did not want to hear about the financial implications at the start of the process, but as time went by, I realised how difficult life on my own with 2 kids was, and I had to think about my kids first.
When you are dealing with divorce, it’s not about having the quickest divorce. It is not a competition, it is not a game.
It is better to listen carefully to what your lawyer and financial adviser have to say, however you don’t have to do exactly as told obviously.
But trust me, if you don’t consider the finances, you might end up regretting your decisions and chances are it will have a huge impact on your life, your childrens’ life and your future relationship with your ex.
Think about it.”
Look out for part 2 of Dealing with Divorce tomorrow!
Suzy Miller is the creator of Divorce in a Box and Divorce First Aid Kit, The Alternative Divorce Guide
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Follow Sandie Martel on Twitter and Facebook